There is learning in everything, everyday
9 days of vacation and I had an amazing take away for each day. Just typing them out for my own clarity of thoughts.
1. Your thinking can literally change destiny
On day 1 of the vacation we planned to cancel and turn back after reaching the destination and on Day 2 we were back on moving ahead. What changed? All I can say is the miracle was created by, being calm through crisis, not getting sucked by the negativity, staying focused on what I envisioned and accepting the situation as it is without getting bogged down.
2. Not everyone has the same interests, and we need to accept and acknowledge it.
Trying to show them our perspective is not easy and needs extreme patience and perseverance and we might still fail. Its ok.
3. Vocabulary matters.
When you call something a problem you crib, when you see it as a challenge, you are already looking for a solution.
A vacation filled with several sicknesses for everyone including cough, knee pain, hip pain, extreme stomach upsets, vomiting; disinterest in the places visited including my daughter not wanting to go on the trains that were especially booked for her with lot of money loss; paying heavy fines for extra luggage and still facing the challenge of dissatisfaction from everyone for not carrying enough; fussy eater being hungry and then throwing tantrums throughout not understanding that hunger is causing the frustration; heavy traffic jams leading to crossing 5 KMs in 2 hrs; ending up sight seeing only toilets rather than any other scenic beauty and the list has a lot more that I would refrain from describing. But we found our way through and that’s what matters.
4. The 3rd law of motion is always in action, what you put into the world is what you get.
It was hard, but I pushed myself to not be sucked up by all the negativity and at the end I managed to get some time to myself and do some things that I had longed for in total peace!! it was completely unplanned. That was my reward for being positive and being a good girl :)
5. Every moment has something to cherish, we only need to find it.
There were times when I felt I was getting bored. I had not even a book to read. My daughter wanted to only crib and cry. It was hard to remain sane and keep perspective. But I did come up with innovative ways to talk to her. I was successful sometimes and not some other times. But in the process, I did realize that these were the times I am actually giving undivided attention to my children as there is no cooking to do, no office call, no cleaning and literally nothing else. That was important to me.
6. Look at what was good and keep an open mind, you never know what treasures lay ahead.
I had to motivate my daughter to be interested in sightseeing and so I had to come up with pep talks now and then. Every time I told her to stay positive and talked to her about all the nice things that had happened, it dawned on me that how I was also able to see the positive and had a good feeling inside me.
We managed to see and touch real snow when no one expected that it would even snow(even the locals were surprised), we could go so close to water bodies like lake and falls which we have never done before, we ate authentic momos in the little shop which showered such great hospitality, we got to go on a rope way which my daughter enjoyed, my daughters got to do ziplining, twice, which was unplanned, we visited the chaar dhaam place which was nice, we got to stay in a villa in a remote village where I saw that the décor of the home stay was absolutely simple and heartwarming, I got introduced to new books and authors seeing the books in the villa, managed to buy gifts for everyone we wanted to, we saw the red panda that is seen only in the eastern india, we ate 1 kg of litchi, we ate almost every famous sweet of kolkatta, managed an unplanned temple visit with no fuss and peace and list is longer…. I did a lot of things and I think that’s good enough to call it a great vacation
7. Complete relaxation is needed occasionally.
Cut off from daily activity including the digital resources is definitely one of the best ways to force ourselves into being in the present and focusing on what we do in the present moment. I did not have connectivity and so I could not do any browsing, no social media, no office mails etc; for many hours in a day. At first it was very hard and frustrating. But over time I got used to it and then came to enjoy it.
8. Be who you are, always.
Sometimes people agree with us, sometimes they don’t. sometimes they acknowledge our efforts and sometimes they don’t. sometimes they think we are right and sometimes they feel we make no sense. It does not matter what anyone thinks or does. We need to reflect who we are and respectfully acknowledge the other person’s opinion and leave it at that. We can take feedback, contemplate on it to see if it is worth incorporating. But it makes no sense to brood over and mull over someone’s opinion and then reflect that negativity back. If I believe I am a nice person, then I am a nice person irrespective of the person I am interacting with. I had a lot of people shower advice, thoughts, opinions, ideas on how I can be/do better. All I first heard was I am not doing/being good enough and not trying hard enough. But after a while I took hold of myself and learnt to just acknowledge the opinion and let it go. It was not easy, but was worth the effort.
9. At the end, everything gets done. We just need to enjoy the journey.
Even after all the challenges and change of plans, we made it through almost every activity we planned and ticked off most important things on the list. So, all is well that ends well
